{"id":388,"date":"2016-12-12T14:55:08","date_gmt":"2016-12-12T19:55:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dadwithplaid.wordpress.com\/?p=24"},"modified":"2016-12-12T14:55:08","modified_gmt":"2016-12-12T19:55:08","slug":"relationships-are-hard","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/2016\/12\/12\/relationships-are-hard\/","title":{"rendered":"Relationships are Hard"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>No, I don&#8217;t just mean romantic ones or family ones.\u00a0 Relationships are difficult, period.<br \/>\nThe level of effort required for a relationship is a major deciding factor when choosing whether or not to engage in it.\u00a0 Is it worth it?\u00a0 Should I open up my heart to this person?\u00a0 Should I take a chance?\u00a0 If I&#8217;m honest in my quirks, will they think I&#8217;m insane?\u00a0 Could time spent hanging out with this person be better spent elsewhere?\u00a0 How much work will maintaining this relationship require on my part?<br \/>\n<img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-31\" src=\"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/12\/eleanorroosevelt1.png\" alt=\"eleanorroosevelt\" width=\"617\" height=\"347\" \/><br \/>\nI think Eleanor captured the core of our fears in this statement.<br \/>\nCaution can be a terrible stumbling block.\u00a0 Hesitation, though only for a moment, can lead to a lifetime of loneliness.\u00a0 Reservation can construct a barrier, one that seals us off from emotion and locks us in a cell of selfishness.\u00a0 We want people to believe our lives are perfect.\u00a0 Relationships threaten that image.\u00a0 Why?\u00a0 Because it invites that person into the inner mechanisms that make your life tick.\u00a0 Someone might discover you&#8217;re not perfect.\u00a0 They might discover you have an anger problem.\u00a0 They might see that you don&#8217;t have your life together, or worse&#8230;that you&#8217;re slowly losing control of it.<br \/>\nIt&#8217;s a battle of pride.\u00a0 In this country men struggle with it more than women do.\u00a0 Women tend to open up with each other more about their struggles and identify with each other more quickly.\u00a0 Of course, many times this comes back with a vengeance when they have a disagreement and they throw all of the others&#8217; struggles right back in their face.\u00a0 Men, on the other hand, are brought up in our culture with the desire to prove that we don&#8217;t need anyone, and we certainly don&#8217;t want to convey any emotion in relation to what is going on in our lives.\u00a0 Why?\u00a0 Emotion signifies weakness.\u00a0 Vulnerability exposes you to potential attacks, and we must, above all else, never show that we might need something, tangible or otherwise.<br \/>\nThe potential effort along with the drawbacks of our imagination set us up for a very lonely life.<br \/>\nLet&#8217;s pause for a moment though.\u00a0 How do we really find meaning?\u00a0 How do we live out the purpose for which we were made?\u00a0 The answer is: beyond ourselves.\u00a0 Getting involved in the lives of others.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t mean saying &#8220;I&#8217;m praying for you, bro.&#8221;\u00a0 I mean actually getting to know someone.\u00a0 Getting to know their needs, the things they struggle with, and areas where they might need encouragement as a human being.\u00a0 Paying attention to God and paying attention to others is how we find that meaning beyond our tiny existence.\u00a0 Alone, we fall trap to bitterness and selfishness.\u00a0 But getting involved, now there&#8217;s the stuff that gives us purpose and allows us to build a life and legacy that will live on long after our time on this globe is up.<br \/>\nAre we going to let a little effort stand between us and purpose?\u00a0 Will we allow a slight momentary inconvenience rob others of the things we can contribute to their lives, and vice versa?<br \/>\nLet&#8217;s be a part of something bigger than ourselves.\u00a0 Let&#8217;s extend a hand to others without expectation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>No, I don&#8217;t just mean romantic ones or family ones.\u00a0 Relationships are difficult, period. The level of effort required for a relationship is a major deciding factor when choosing whether or not to engage in it.\u00a0 Is it worth it?\u00a0 Should I open up my heart to this person?\u00a0 Should I take a chance?\u00a0 If&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/388"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=388"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/388\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=388"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=388"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/wesleymillerbooks.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=388"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}